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Hillbilly Horoscopes


Horoscopes
Fresh Porch-Pickin’ Horoscopes
Capricorn
Person to avoid: Amy. (You know which one.)
Food to avoid: Popcorn
Day(s) to avoid: Sunday. Stay inside.


Capricorn (Oct. 2025)
You’ll need to forgive yourself as you’ll pick the wrong neighborhood for trick or treating. You know the one, the one that hands out...


Capricorn (Aug. 2025)
You’ll feel a strong desire to stay in your pjs for the first week of the month as you’re getting older. Embrace comfort but avoid...


Capricorn (Aug. 2025)
You’ve been needing extra energy to get through the day, which is understandable after your office chair spontaneously combusted last...
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